You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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