When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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