Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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