So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
