Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
