So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Barsexuality is the new black.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
