That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I would ride that face into the sunset
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
