You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
