Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
