I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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