I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Vodka?
Forever.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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