He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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