ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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