hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
