I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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