I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
