): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
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