I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
