you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize