what if every blade of grass was a penis?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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