I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize