Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize