I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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