3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
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