3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Dual....:-)
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
