Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
