VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
