Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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