dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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