"it" just moved
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
