Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
