you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
