woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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