Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize