i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
