Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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