I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
