i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
they need to just BURY HIM!
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Randomize
