You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Randomize
