Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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