Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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