I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
