So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Randomize