My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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