my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
