I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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