We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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