she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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