Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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