I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
How external is "for external use only"?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.