Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
