It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
